I’ve always thought that I’m just not the falling-in-love type of person. In situations when someone of my age would just go crazy and go write silly poems I tend to sink into analysis. What’s that about? What’s that I’m feeling (am I actually feeling?) What’s happening? What’s next? Etc. till I get a terrible headache and everything just goes wrong.

What stroke my mind today is the realization that maybe it’s not my *feature*, but just me prohibiting myself from falling in love carelessly?

Today I performed really badly at the boogie class, and as the tutor says my main problem is failing to relax and stop controlling what’s happening (as you know, in partner dances the guy leads, the girl follows). I was thinking about the problem and it led me to a thought that maybe it’s not just dancing, but a major issue of mine?

I tried to analyse the subtext of my thoughts when *over-thinking feelings* (you can tell I’m REALLY into dumb analysis) and I realized that deep inside I’m afraid of acting silly. I need to have a really good reason to say that I’m feeling something towards a person. Like, spending a couple of months in a relationship and getting to know him really well. Falling in love with someone you barely know and only have seen for a couple of times is silly, right?

The fact is it’s not, and I don’t know if (and how) this discovery will help me, but it certainly seems very important for me now. I really need to stop holding back and let myself go more often. And — maybe — this will lead me not only to becoming a better boogie woogie dancer :)

#personal #too #much #analysis

wolf playing in the snow

(Source: woodser)

via wolveswolves (originally woodser)

29140 notes

Texture

#my #soul #is #dancing

#is #my #soul #dancing

I don’t get it when people do something for a person and say that they don’t expect anything in return, and then, when they don’t get anything, they stay silent but in their head (or in conversation with other people) they kind of «draw their conclusions» about that person. Like, I did this because I wanted and you don’t have to do anything or thank me, but that has nothing to do with you being a selfish son of a bitch that is going to be punished by universe booo.

Man, that’s really hypocrite but it happens all around me and it’s so tempting to act the same way. But when I personally make someone a favor and don’t expect anything — well I fucking mean it or at least I do my best to avoid these poisonous thoughts.

1 notes #personal #people

I’m sick of having to hurry because life is short. Sick of being in a stupid situation when I’m still not fully adult and independent but also not so «youngest» young anymore. Sick of feeling inexperienced and unattractive. Ughhhh.

#personal

bvddhist:

upclosefromafar:

whisperskat:

Choose their Freedom

❁⊱☀~Nature n stuff~☀⊰❁

Organic  // Spiritual  // Hippie 
via bvddhist (originally whisperskat)

6463 notes

bvddhist:

superrobel:

"A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself."

- Josh Billings 

Organic  // Spiritual  // Hippie 
via bvddhist (originally chaosbrewd)

166848 notes

bvddhist:

lunar-amethyst:

❂ॐ☮Hippie|Spiritual|Nature blog☮ॐ❂

Organic  // Spiritual  // Hippie 
via bvddhist (originally an-outside-chance)

27076 notes

bvddhist:

lunar-amethyst:

❂ॐ☮Hippie|Spiritual|Nature blog☮ॐ❂
Organic  // Spiritual  // Hippie 

(Source: laughingbear)

via bvddhist (originally laughingbear)

200574 notes

Aum